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Welcome to the Official Website of Door of Hope Counseling Resource Center, Inc.
Sexual Abuse
Sexual Abuse is an uncomfortable fact of life that most people cannot look in the eye. It is a painful subject that even the church refuses to talk about. Some of our counselees were actually sexually abused as children. One is a victim of incest. Let us call her Ellen (not her real name). Ellen, now in her 20's was ten years old when her uncle abused her. We learn that listening to stories of abused women like Ellen (there are abused men,too) can be profoundly healing. These stories may be bits and pieces of one's past. There is something real in those stories that is available for someone to talk about in the present time. But sharing what is remembered can be terrifying. "My head and heart are restless until I will put these things on paper." Ellen quipped. "I don't know how important it is to settle the past. For me, I don't want my past to be remembered. I will only remember those things I hated to remember. She continued. "I always run, run, run as long as I can, as fast as I can if there is some place to hide where I can no longer feel the same things over and over again. I'm helpless, alone, hopeless and unworthy."
Ellen runs away when she is most scared and when she is hurt. But she does not run as runners do (they have goals set up ahead). She runs in her thoughts and can get lost in her scramblings. "For 11 years I kept on running from those ugly scenes in my life. They are horrible monsters that run after me. I admit I lived my life in dishonesty, pretending to be fine and nothing happened. The cry within my soul longs to have rest. I don't want to hear the cry of a child. I hate it...How could he do that to me?"
The once too difficult to talk about is now standing right before her eyes. The pain of wounded memories is relived. What has been lost is now named. Several sessions later, Ellen sent a note to her counselor (with permission to print), "You're the only one I talked to about my abuse. I hope you will not reject me. I really need a person who can assure me that I am still loved and cared for." It is important that Ellen's loss should be shared with someone she trusts. Someone who can stand by her no matter what happens. That way, she can be helped to speak out what she has long kept in silence.
Our counselees share their stories with us. We are reminded that there is a sense of sacredness in listening to another person's story (Eugene Peterson). And there is a "sacred space at the Door of Hope Counseling Resource Center where the wounded and broken people can come for storytelling." It is a place where we can learn to honour the "holy one" within each other!
It is an honour to share the experience of these hurting women and to sojourn with them in their journey towards healing and growth. While we can share their pain, we are aware that that is their pain and not ours. To enter into their pain, however, is not an easy one. We covet your prayers!
